I just want to piss my money away

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Here is a list of all the casinos and shady bookie operations I have ventured into and lived to yelp about it.
  • 1550 N Ingram Blvd
    West Memphis, AR 72301
    Vereinigte Staaten
    2.0 Sterne

    One thing I always promised myself is that I would NEVER cross the bridge.  I get it, call me a biased prick.  One of my employees then invited me to house for a July 4th cookout.  He's a great guy, so I bit the bullet, and crossed the bridge (he lives in Marion, AR).  On my way to his place, I saw a big building on the right, which I later found out was a dog racing track and a casino.  

    Long story short, 2 weeks ago, I had the itch, and I didn't feel like driving to Tunica.  So my roomie and I went to Southland to check it out.  Upon getting there, the way they tell you to go, is quite possibly the most dangerous street I have ever been on.  It is a dark, mile+ long stretch of road that you can pretty much do anything on.  

    When we arrived to the casino, we headed straight up stairs to check out the dog track.  It looked cool, but I later found out they only do the dog races in the day time (they have a whole schedule a betting guide as well you can take).  When pulling out money, I noticed the ATM I used was only dispensing $100 bills, which sucked- I didn't want to give this place all of money (which I ended up doing anyway).

    We ended up going to the gaming floor, and realized that about 98% of the machines were all video screens, I personally am not a fan of that when it comes to gambling (my theory is the more electronics there is to a machine, the more likely it can get tampered with)- so I tried to look for my normal machines.

    My roommate hit 2 nice jackpots, but I didn't get shit (they must have heard me badmouth the place under all of the surveillance, oh well).  I even went to the high limit room, which was like 10 cramped machines, and couldn't get a lick.  When I say high limit, the stakes were not as high as a typical casino, mind you.  I think the highest stake was like $9 a spin (yea, it seems like a lot, but go to other places were they have $100/500 spin machines).

    Now here is the part that really bothered me.  I understand at casinos, people get drunk and they will come up to you, say a few words, and then crawl in a corner and disappear.  But this one particular person kept coming up to my roommate and I, and asking if he could put his card in the machine to get points.  This happened on like 4 occasions.  I could tell he was on something, so I ended up telling him to get lost.  I was disappointed that security didn't pick up on what he was doing and escort him off the premises- as we wasn't even gambling, just using other peoples wages for his "rewards".  Bastard.  

    It seems to me that a lot of people like this place, and maybe one afternoon I will catch a dog race and love it, but until then, I really don't have any reason to come back to this place.

  • 13615 Old Hwy 61
    Robinsonville, MS 38664
    Vereinigte Staaten
    4.0 Sterne

    For some reason, Easter and gambling is starting to become a tradition of mine.  It all started 11 years ago when my mom, grandma, and I went to PHX for Easter to see family.  We went to the casinos all weekend long.  

    Then everytime I was in Louisville for Easter, I would be sure to cross the river and hit up the casino.

    This Easter was no exception- I literally just moved to Memphis that very day, and thought it would be appropriate to hit up Tunica, which is about 45 minutes from Memphis.

    Mind you, this place is a compound.  I think it was planned to be 45 minutes away from society and the one way in, one way out deal, I think is for security purposes.

    When pulling up to the place- there are many buildings around- make sure you go to the gawdy pink and blue one if you want to gamble.  

    When walking in, its a single hallway that opens up with shit all around.  And yes, you can smoke in here so be mindful of that.  

    My game of choice is always the $1or5 version of the Wheel of Fortune.  If I could play it all day, I would.  However, they only had the $0.25 version. This broke my heart.  Someone insisted they had it- but my nose and eyes are trained for this kind of stuff, and after 5 laps, they were not spotted. That was a huge bummer for me.

    Since I was new to the Harrah's world, I signed up for a rewards card- all I had to do was hand over my license and I instantly got a card.  

    Same thing with the cashier.  However, if you have a debit or credit card that says "Check ID", they deem the card invalid and tell you to go use the machine.  Interesting...

    This place can be dangerous so frequent trips will not be for me, but I think this would be a great place to have a UYE!

  • 9800 E Indian Bend Rd
    Scottsdale, AZ 85256
    Vereinigte Staaten
    3.0 Sterne

    From afar, you could seriously convince yourself that this place is a huge hospital.  It is definitely a compound!   And when you see a Hampton Inn right in front of it, its even more convincing!  

    The closer you get though, you realize that this place is actually pretty nice...

    My friend and his GF wanted to check this place (its a few miles closer than the stand-alone Casino AZ) out to go (yup you guessed it) gambling.

    We arrived on a Thursday night, and it was pretty crowded!  A much hipper crowd (as you could tell just by the cars near the valet) than the other place.

    I found it interesting how the hotel lobby was right next to the entrance of the casino- that is kind of iffy to me... I know they do it so they can suck you dry, but still, I would have expected better from a place like this.

    This place houses a much younger crowd and is definitely less smoky than other casinos around... But I am there to win money, not to get married or to breathe clean air.  Unfortunately, I lost $200 on slots here quicker than I lost $100 playing blackjack on a cruise ship.  I realized then this place wasn't for me.

    There aren't nearly as many bill-breaking machines here either, so plan ahead and good luck finding an open seat.

    If you want to see or be seen, then this is the place for you.  If you want to win money, head down the highway (I am sure people are winning tons of jackpots there as I am writing this)...

  • 1107 Casino Center Drive
    Tunica Resorts, MS 38664
    Vereinigte Staaten
    3.0 Sterne

    So, it's Labor Day weekend, and you won a bunch of money at Harrah's.  So what do you do?  Go casino hopping!  So that's what my buddy and I did.  Just down the street from Harrah's, is a place called Casino Center, where from right to left is the Roadhouse, Horseshoe, and Gold Strike casinos.  And you better believe, we hit all three.  We usually stay at Harrah's, but we went overboard.

    Roadhouse is the smallest of the casinos I have been to, but I like the feel of it.  When you enter, you feel like you are in the wild west.  I was in search for a special Wheel of Fortune machine- which is $5 pull, 10$ max.  That's my poison right there.  Well, that night, my buddy and seemed to have robbed that machine, as we got a few K off of it.  Back to that in a moment...

    I like this place since it doesn't seem to be as crowded as the other casinos- as I am there to gamble, not to mingle (sorry, I am antisocial when it comes to gambling).  In terms of food, I have no idea what they have, and they do have a bar with a stage too.  But honestly, I was just here for the one machine.

    As we got tired, we tried to use my buddies TR Diamond status to get us a room, but they claimed they were booked (please!).  So I cannot actually review any rooms here- shucks.  So we moved on...

    The other night, I snapped, I ended up going back right after work (I think it was Thursday night).  I went to the same machine, and only intended to put $200 in it and see what happened... I will let your imagination run wild as to what happened next...

    This place has some potential and I like it, but with what happened my last visit, I promised myself I won't be going back for quite some time...

  • 777 Casino Dr
    Cherokee, NC 28719
    Vereinigte Staaten
    3.0 Sterne

    On the way home from Charlotte, I thought one thing- I need to make a detour, I have an itch.  Before I go any further, I find it interesting that its the same drive from Charlotte to Cherokee as it is from Atlanta to Cherokee- that just shows you how wide North Carolina really is!  

    So, after driving in the pitch black icy mountains, I was shocked we made it alive.  f you do come from Charlotte, please be very careful!  I drive nearly 50,000 miles a year, in all SORTS of shit, but that drive in itself was one to remember...

    It was a relief when we saw the lights, to say the least.  And when we did arrive (Black Friday) I was amazed to see how crowded this place was.  I am a small time (but possibly frequent) gambler and I have never been to Vegas (who needs it when I have a casino 30 min from my current living situation?)- but I tell you what- this place was HOPPING!!!

    It was as if the parking deck was as tall as the casino/hotel itself.  We parked on like the 8th floor.  Should have taken it to the roof to get some great views of pitch black mountains.  When we entered, I was almost lost.  The gaming floor was pretty large, and when I asked my friend (who has been to Vegas a few times) he said the size was on par with some of the casinos there.

    Now, when it comes to slots, I strictly play 5 types of machines (unless I am drunk, but honestly, [like for real, honestly] I don't drink and gamble anymore)- and for how big this place was, I was kind of upset how hard it was to find the machines I play.  I did a semi walk with my friend, and told him (since his phone had died), to meet me back at the really big fountain (I assume it is in the center) in 30 minutes.  He plays blackjack.  I went hunting in the High Limit room and got $200.  I walked around and was amazed to see all of the people pissing $1000s of dollars by the minute.  I finally found the closest machine that I play- it was a 5 line, $1 slot.  There went $100.  So I said F this high limit room, and went on.

    I then went to find one of the million penny slot, 300 line ($3 max bet) machines, but I didn't win shit.  Then, at this point, I was just pissing the last of my money away.

    And then, after I am down $200, low and behold- I finally see just ONE (out of the TONS) of my machines I always play- the 9 line, $1 slot (yea, its $9 a spin on max bet, but I have won some madddd cash on just 1-2 spins) triple diamond.  So, I went and got another $100, and blew it all away.  I was pretty pissed.

    I then met up with my friend at the fountain, he actually didn't lose all of his money!  I think what pissed me off was the fact they have screens everywhere bragging about they have paid out $4.7 billion alone at that casino alone this year, well I sure as hell didn't see any of it!

    I will admit, this place was pretty fancy, but at the end of the day, I am there to make some money.  If I want glitz, I would go to Monaco.  We then took the 3 hour drive of shame back to Atlanta.  At least we got to visit a prison on our way back...

    For now, I will stick to Harrah's Tunica, and not on the weekends....

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"Manager, culinarian, bad@$$, not neccessarily in that order"

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